Hi Bron

Thank you for your reply - 2.54 in the morning?! No wonder you can’t get up!

Are you upset or anxious about anything or is it just a problem with your sleep?

I assume you have tried Nytol and Kalms. The trouble is our bodies can not function without sleep. It becomes a vicious circle, you must be exhausted.

Have you spoken with your doctor? I have been prescribed sleeping tablets as well as a whole load of other stuff - and whilst I am really an anti-drug person - I gave in and now sleep really well. I do have other issues and demons to sort out but it is a lot easier for me to face with a good night’s sleep.

Hope to hear from you.

With best wishes

Steve

Hello, everyone I’ve just been reading all your posts about having trouble sleeping due to depression.  As a fellow sufferer I can understand how awful it is.  Just being so tired all the time is such a downbeat way to survive. Some days I can manage to get out of bed by around 10.30 but other days it’s mid afternoon. (The guilt is enormous). 
BUT,  I read some of your very helpful ways of gradually dealing with this and I intend to actually try something - I promise myself to be up by 10.25 tomorrow.
The most uplifting thought I have from all your comments is that we are all surviving in spite of the illness. Good luck and my very best wishes to you all.

Hi
I’ve not been around for a while and have been feeling better.  It isn’t anything to do with the pills I have to say, but sleeping.  If I don’t sleep then I feel awful. I know if I’m not dropping off that putting the radio on on radio 4 works for me and I do go off.  This even works when my brain is doing its best to stay awake.
I’m exhausted today and am working from home tomorrow so will get up late. I have financial worries that are worrying me hugely. I don’t know where the money is coming from to pay my mortgage and bills on Thursday and the bank are calling me every 5 mins adding to the pressure. I have been avoiding speaking to them because I’m waiting to hear on something which could solve the issue. I feel sick thinking about it and had a rough day today anyway.  I know I’m going to have to face it but I’m dreading it.
I’m so tired I just want to go to sleep so I’ll get an early night tonight.
Hope things are getting better. Hang on in there!
Snoopy x

Ever since I am being involved in Marketing field, the targets achieving made me bit depressed. Mentally I may not show its symptoms but physically I am too old to be with the pace of work load?
How can I use this depression as a fun?

Hello Nicolas, you certainly sound in the midst of it right now and when you’re in the midst of anything you hardly have time to think clearly or have fun even if you are having fun.  Your workload and mood seem pretty heavy right now.  I am sure that you have noticed that when life is as hard as it seems to be for you right now, nothing seems much fun and we don’t feel much like laughing or even smiling when in fact laughter and having fun are amazing antidotes to depression as they release feel-good hormones.

When you are in a positive cyle of enjoying life, your work, your friends and family, you laugh a lot and have fun and life seems and is a whole lot better as you tackle it much differently.  The other side of the coin is a slippery slope as the harder that work and life seems, the less you enjoy or look forward to anything, the less you smile and the less well you deal with things so the worse everything seems and indeed gets.  It is so hard to break the cycle but the best remedies to depression are incongruent with depression, like laughing, exercising, getting out in the sunshine, eating healthily and looking after ourselves.  All these things are omitted from our lives and tend to go out of the window when we are overloaded and feeling down yet they are the most important things to keep us ‘up’. 

It sounds like you are very busy Nicolas but could you put on a funny film or a comedy sketch on the TV (something or someone that you like) every evening for a week and see the difference it makes?  I took a friend of mine who was very depressed to see a comedian.  She didn’t want to go out never mind go to see a comedian.  He was very funny and she couldn’t help but laugh.  She laughed a lot and she felt much better for 2 days afterwards.  When she went home it was harder to keep up that momentum of doing things to make you feel better as she didn’t feel like it at the time even though she knew she would feel better if she did.  She went to bed instead and we all know that that doesn’t work either but often it’s the place we feel the safest and it is escapism from our problems albeit temporarily.  Is there any chance Nicolas that you could ask for a lesser workload or if you are not enjoying the job, is there anything else you would like to do as a job?  If not, try to balance your work with things that make you feel better so that work doesn’t seem so bad as it isn’t your whole life and you won’t resent it as much.  I really feel for you Nicolas.  Hopefully you will get some advise from other people on the site who are experiencing similar situations.  In the meantime, I wish you all the best.  Helen

when i was depressed i found getting a dog really helped me she was my best friend she knew how to manage my depression and nudged me with her nose when i was at my worst I didn’t feel alone. When i was depressed 11 years ago i stayed in bed for 6 months. I was telling my story to somebody and she said spitfully you must have got out for a wee. That really hurt because she obviously didn’t understand depression. I look back now a different person. My heart always crys out to you guys when I read your posts. Can I just say how STRONG you are because if you can’t get out of bed you need STRENGTH and some how you find it not just once a hundred times over and over and over again. Can I just say you are amazing. You are amazing and you have Strength !!! you really do and you test that strength every waking day.

Thank you for your note,  I would love to have another dog,  but my husband says he can’t go through having one put down again (the memory of that day still feels horrific even after 8 years)
I am so pleased your dog has been such a help to you.  it must help to lift the depression a little when you see a wagging tail and those lovely eyes.  You certainly were ill having to stay in bed all those months, but your words are so encouraging and you are right in saying it does take strength, and willpower, as well to get up every day (I must confess it was 5 pm one day last week) but most days it’s not too bad.  I would just say though - you do need supportive friends - rather than spiteful ones.
All the best to you Chloe,  may your recovery continue.  Kind regards, jeanh

Thank you for your kind words. I was listening to Dale Carnegie today and he said something about laughter alot like Helen mentions. They were saying laughter is a wonderful cure. Looking back at the way i behaved when I was depressed can be funny and I laugh with beautiful thoughts of a friend attempting to break into my house because I wouldn’t let anybody see me. She actually got stuck and I could hear help help at the time I hated it and I wanted her to go away. I was so angry and cross with her she was intruding into my space because I was ashamed of my depression and wanted to die and did not want to be around others let them see me. I had to go and rescue her she was stuck getting over my garden wall. I look back and laugh now. She did come in and made me some food and a cup of tea. She did not stop chatting and laughing and ignored the fact i was so angry with her for coming around. She cheered me up no end. We have been friends for years and she was the only friend who bothered with me when I was depressed. Yes you are right in what you say. Friends are beautiful beautiful gifts. Helen looks back and laughs at her depression now it helps me to laugh too because for a long time I was ashamed I had it. Now I look back and laugh and encourage others to see the funny things that occur the daft things I and they do.

Your note is really helpful, many thanks.  Kind regards, jean

Somebody wrote me a beautiful mail about crisis weeks ago and I could not get into the web page to answer him because my computer was crashing. He was saying about how nice it feels when people talk and are kinder in times of crisis i.e. when there was a petrol strike people chatted at the petrol pumps when there is normally silence. My gran said I would have loved the war I was shocked ‘why gran ?’ ‘because everyone pulled together’ she said ‘if your house got bombed you stayed with your neighbour and everybody looked out for you, people were kind giving and we in return gave what we had’. The war brings out good in people, solidarity support and this forum brings support in a depressive time. I guess this forum gives us wonderful friends. Hope thats not too deep ? Thank you Jean

Yes, I had to think about that,  and it makes a lot of sense.  I suppose, in a way, this forum is a sort of group therapy as everyone has a common problem.  You seem to be recovering so well and I feel that I am doing well (there are many more good days than bad).  So perhaps we’ll be signing out of here soon.  Kind regards, jean

You are so lovely Jean. Dale Carnegie is talking about living in the moment today. ‘How to stop worrying and start living’ When I was depressed I started to listen to tapes. My employer sent them, they were really kind and considerate and sent them from the occupatinal health library. I found I couldn’t read when i was depressed so the personnel officers sent me self help tapes to listen to. Their inspirational tapes helped me enormously. I am now a bit of a self help junkie and I love listening to Wayne Dyer, Dale Carnegie, Tony Robbins and Byron Katie. Anyway Dale said to take each day one day at a time and reward your success I have heard this before. However I had to share it with you because you are doing this you said earlier and it is working. You said some days It takes so long to get up and other days it takes till this long. Being on this forum you are helping other people, YOU are helping others and by being honest we are supporting eachother. So you just have to accept you are wonderful because wonderful people help eachother :0) You helped me today because I needed to think positive to help you, you were positive and helped me.

Hello, Chloe,  I looked up Dale Carnegie on the web, I only saw the one about worrying - he had made a video of quotations etc.  and most of them were so true. It does make me aware of how (maybe you were the same) - when I am feeling down - I tend to forget all the good things in my life.  I’ve only looked up this one person, but if the others you mention are as wise, no wonder you are finding them so helpful.  You are so kind passing on all the suggestions that work for you. Many thanks.
Kind regards, jean

I found the most powerful cds were Byron Katie and Wayne Dyer ‘making your thoughts work for you’ £15 It was like CBT cognitive behavioural therapy. Katie had really bad depression and found a way out of it by thinking differently. I buy Amazon old and used and they are such wonderful quality and value. I have also listened to Marissa Peer’s book and I tell myself ‘I am enough’ I also watched her and Helen on the computer being interviewed. I found it began to make sense and when I applied their way of thinking my life improved. It might sound lame but it worked it really worked. There was an oppinion poll on the radio whereby people put their computer and mobile phones before food and clothes because we all need to connect I guess. People would rather text than eat. I guess Maslov (heirarchy of needs) was right about emotional needs. I love having friends to talk to plus it’s great to talk to you Thank you Jean :0)

Hello, Chloe, Your note is very interesting. I’ve been away for a couple of days, so have managed   without my computer, but did need my mobile.
I will try to get “making your thoughts work for you”
I haven’t gone into the others you mention but I was impressed by Byron Katie,  when she said we are living in the moment, so don’t worry about the future and the past has gone anyway. I suppose it’s another version of getting through one day at a time,
but one moment at a time seems so much quicker and perhaps more satisfying when I think about it.
Although I don’t know how to apply this when trying to sleep etc.  This all seems a bit jumbly when I read it, does it make sense to you ? Kind regards, jean